Thursday, January 19, 2012

Gujarati Moments of my life

Real moments of my life.

Gujju uncle to mom: Tamari baby bou single che...

Me(thinking): Of course single che, I am 15, do you expect me to be committed at such a young age?

Mom: Haa... Game tetalu khavdavo to pan patadi j rahe che!

Me(enlightened!): Oh... you mean slim.


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Gujju girl to me: Hu 'what' aapi ne avi, te apyo?

Me: what???

Gujju girl(showing her index finger marked with ink): Arey 'what' yaar...

Me(enlightened again!): Oh! Vote...


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Scene: College AV room, gujju student presenting a topic to gujju sir.

Me - sleeping in the class room

Gujju student - presenting with ultra confidence

Gujju sir - looking for some reason to corner gujju student

Gujju Sir(loudly): But how does it know which John to use?

Gujju Student(Even louder): It does this polling and selects a John closer and perfect to use!!!

Me(wide awake and wondering): John? What is John doing in a computer science subject?

Gujju Sir(exasperated): And how do we know the John is the one to use?

Me extremely confused look up at the projected slide to realize our John is actually a... ZONE!

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Gujju Gal 1: Rujuta, mari jode peejho leva chalne...

Me(stumped): Peejho?

Gujju Gal 1: Haa peejho! Bou j bhukh lagi che...

Gujju Gal 2(whispering in my ears): She means pizza!

Me: OHHHH....! Chalo..!

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Scene: Me and lighting guy discussing how to set lighting for an event.

Me: I want this particular area to be highlighted, the others lights must be off, only this area should be illuminated.

Lighting Guy: Ok ma'am, I will get fox lights to do the work.

Me: Are you sure, these fox lights will work?

Lighting Guy: Ofcourse ma'am they will, check this out!

Lighting guy demonstrated a spotlight thingy, and fox turned out to be the Gujarati version of FOCUS

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Scene: English classes going on in college. Professor has just asked the students to translate 'Mummy e jamavanu banavyu.' into English. Many hands are raised up to give the answer, professor selects one confident looking girl.

Professor: Yes, tell me the English of that sentence.

Girl(with lots and lots of confidence): Mother was cooked!

Me - the only student in class banging the desk and howling with laughter, as the confident girl stares defiantly not knowing where she went wrong...


Note: All of above incidences have been related here in the lightest of the light manner, even though if I have offended someone I am sorry. If you still feel offended, go find yourself some good sense of humor.