Thursday, January 19, 2012

Gujarati Moments of my life

Real moments of my life.

Gujju uncle to mom: Tamari baby bou single che...

Me(thinking): Of course single che, I am 15, do you expect me to be committed at such a young age?

Mom: Haa... Game tetalu khavdavo to pan patadi j rahe che!

Me(enlightened!): Oh... you mean slim.


Gujju girl to me: Hu 'what' aapi ne avi, te apyo?

Me: what???

Gujju girl(showing her index finger marked with ink): Arey 'what' yaar...

Me(enlightened again!): Oh! Vote...


Scene: College AV room, gujju student presenting a topic to gujju sir.

Me - sleeping in the class room

Gujju student - presenting with ultra confidence

Gujju sir - looking for some reason to corner gujju student

Gujju Sir(loudly): But how does it know which John to use?

Gujju Student(Even louder): It does this polling and selects a John closer and perfect to use!!!

Me(wide awake and wondering): John? What is John doing in a computer science subject?

Gujju Sir(exasperated): And how do we know the John is the one to use?

Me extremely confused look up at the projected slide to realize our John is actually a... ZONE!


Gujju Gal 1: Rujuta, mari jode peejho leva chalne...

Me(stumped): Peejho?

Gujju Gal 1: Haa peejho! Bou j bhukh lagi che...

Gujju Gal 2(whispering in my ears): She means pizza!

Me: OHHHH....! Chalo..!


Scene: Me and lighting guy discussing how to set lighting for an event.

Me: I want this particular area to be highlighted, the others lights must be off, only this area should be illuminated.

Lighting Guy: Ok ma'am, I will get fox lights to do the work.

Me: Are you sure, these fox lights will work?

Lighting Guy: Ofcourse ma'am they will, check this out!

Lighting guy demonstrated a spotlight thingy, and fox turned out to be the Gujarati version of FOCUS


Scene: English classes going on in college. Professor has just asked the students to translate 'Mummy e jamavanu banavyu.' into English. Many hands are raised up to give the answer, professor selects one confident looking girl.

Professor: Yes, tell me the English of that sentence.

Girl(with lots and lots of confidence): Mother was cooked!

Me - the only student in class banging the desk and howling with laughter, as the confident girl stares defiantly not knowing where she went wrong...

Note: All of above incidences have been related here in the lightest of the light manner, even though if I have offended someone I am sorry. If you still feel offended, go find yourself some good sense of humor.